Wednesday in the Word: There's a sermon in that...

I don't know about you, but it seems to me that, as women, we can be quite territorial. This is something the Lord has really convicted me of lately.

My realllly close friends and family can tell you that I might be one of the world's largest skeptics--a strength when certain discernment is needed but also a great weakness when it turns into a mechanism to protect myself unnecessarily. Truthfully, sometimes it's just easier to stay in your comfort zone  of "like minded" people--but, truthfully, that's just not always where the Lord wants us.

I have a prime example in a furry little lady I know named Sercy. Sercy was my sister's 11th birthday present eight years ago (bear with me even if you aren't a dog person).

Around four years later, a new man entered the scene, this cutie patootie named Boo.

Well, five years after Sercy and Boo became siblings, Sercy still did not really understand the concept or definition of sibling love. She has not liked the competition, the split attention, the company, you name it...she just hasn't been too fond, and quite frankly, it has brought out the worst in her. It's caused her to be snippy, ornary (sp?) and just a grumpy lady!

My parents and sister have been traveling a lot lately so we've been keeping these doggies at our house which means Sercy has been moved out of "her" territory, her comfort zone. She's not the one "in charge." These two dogs have finally been forced onto equal ground.

Low and behold, guess what has happened? Sercy has started LOVING Boo of all things. It's amazing. After all these years, she all of a sudden loves the brother that was given to her and is lost if he is not in her presence. The two of them now look out for one another and are sweet to one another.

How many of us are like that?

 If you ask me, this is a lesson for us women....that once we get over our "territory," we can love our "brother" (or sister) in the way we were created. Furthermore, our "territory" is enhanced and even expands!

I was reminded of this last night when I attended a coffee at my church where I only knew a handful of people. Most of the "security blankets" in my direct comfort zone were not in attendance. Shamefully, if you had told me that not many of my close church friends were going to be there beforehand, I may not have gone. However, it was an AMAZING night. I invited a couple of special friends outside of church that actually came and I was able to connect in a new way with some beautiful sisters in Christ. Most importantly, I witnessed an indescribable energy and presence of the Holy Spirit that I never would have witnessed if I had remained in my comfort zone. I love it when the Lord lifts our eyes!

Both of these examples remind me of the Prayer of Jabez from the Bible.

“Oh, that You would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evil, that I may not cause pain!” 1 Chronicles 4:10

Are you a Sercy? Are you skeptical of anything new in your life? Are you trapped in your comfort zone? I know I am guilty, guilty, guilty.

 Will you join me in praying the prayer of Jabez...that your territory will be enlarged including  really loving your brother (1 John 4:20-21)...yes, even if it's not in your comfort zone?

Train Up Tuesday: Clean Up, Clean Up! and Check out This Giveaway!

I promise, I'll get to the giveaway soon! FIRST, I have to share a "funny" with you. :) A few weeks ago, in an effort to train my 2 "big" boys (5 & 3) to help with cleaning, during nap time I wrote words and symbols on post-it notes of chores for them to do after nap. Each boy had their own color post-it note. I used words to help the 5 year old learn his reading. I used symbols to help the 3 year old figure out what to do. I took pictures of the notes for what I hoped would be a great idea for Roof readers (yeah, I know, I'm rolling my eyes, too ;-).



Then, the magical moment came. My boys awoke from nap, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and looked around the living room at the post-its covering walls, tables, windows. It was like CHRISTMAS!!!! I tried to explain what was going on as they looked around the room (note to self: with boys, at least, always explain what is going on before showing ANY pictures....that's why they grow up looking at instruction pictures and not reading directions as adult males). My oldest "got it". He was delighted to spray windows with cleaner and take a rag to wipe it down. He moved pretty well through the room looking for more notes and jobs (and he still asks for me to do this again)....My middle son who I just have to say never fails to unintentionally make me laugh rose to the occasion (of making me laugh, that is). He raced quickly around the room to grab all of HIS post-its...neverminding what they were instructing him to do (I think maybe he wiped down one table leg). I loved it, though. He felt he had really mastered something (I mean he HAD actually cleaned up all those notes!!!). I just smiled, and patted him on the back, and shook my head. Oh well, he'll get the lesson on that another day. Meanwhile, he's been busy playing "trashman" through the house, so I'll take it!

Okay, thanks for bearing with me on my story. That just cracked me up! Now for the "giveaway" part. The whole "teach your child to enjoy cleaning" idea came from my reading "Large Family Logistics," a book I don't actually own but borrowed and bought to give away to one of you guys a while back. Well, head on over to "Life in a Shoe" to learn how you can have SEVERAL chances to enter to win a copy of the book. They are giving away 4 copies across 4 blogs by 4 moms (lots of 4s in there!). And each blog has multiple opportunities to get your name in the hat(s). You only have until Wednesday (July 13) to enter, so stop what you're doing (I mean, after reading this blog entry, naturally) and go enter! ;-)

Hope you have a happy day,
Ashlie

Marvelous Monday: Summer Reading - Free downloadable books

Summer is a great time to pick up a book and read at leisure while your children nap (if they are still napping age) or after the little ones go to bed at night or you have returned home after a long day at the office and the house is quiet as your family dreams of sugar plums or sprinker time fun. 

I recently came upon amazing Christian fiction author Elizabeth Musser and devoured her recent release The Sweetest Thing.  This is one of the best books I have EVER READ.  This month on amazon you can download a copy of one of her earlier releases called The Swan House. 

From Publishers Weekly

This beautiful story of a young girl coming of age in the midst of racial turmoil and personal tragedy in 1960s Atlanta convincingly describes how religious faith satisfies the girl's deepest longings. Sixteen-year-old Mary Swan Middleton is white, wealthy and privileged "We are, of course, another fine Atlanta family," she says sarcastically. As the novel opens, her artistic and depressed mother has just been killed in an air crash in Paris, leaving a slew of secrets behind. As Mary Swan unlocks the past, she wrestles with her grief over her mother's death and the direction of her own life. But "the Lawd don't neva' waste our pain," says her wise African-American maid, Ella Mae. When Mary Swan begins volunteering with the poor, she falls in love with a handsome black teen, Carl. As she works through her confusion about her feelings for him and her despair over her mother, she finds her true calling as a painter and reformulates her preconceived ideas about race and faith. This creative novel is highly descriptive but not overdone, brimming with touches of humor, factual Atlanta settings, historical incidents and well-developed characters. Some tightening of overlong passages would have accelerated the pace, and the novel would stand on its own more effectively without the introduction and the epilogue, which mostly function as advertisements for a sequel. But these are minor glitches in a book that stands out in recent Christian fiction for its excellent writing and overall quality.
Copyright 2001 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

Follow the link here to secure your copy free of charge (only through June).

You do not need to have an ereader to read downloadable books.  For an informative article that tells you how to read them go here.  One of the publishing groups that I have found to publish highly credible work is Tyndale Publishing.  I recently discovered that each month they offer several of their books to download for free.  Tyndale is offering four books in June only  and one is specifically geared towards tweens and teen girls so if you have one in your household it may be a nice addition to their summer reading.  Hurry over here to see what is being offered this month and if something looks appealing take a minute to download your selection(s)  before we enter July.

Happy Monday and Happy Reading,

Caroline

Thrifty Thursday: Summer Reading With Children

It's no secret that coming up with entertainment for the long days of summer can be a challenge to many moms. Caroline has some GREAT tips on how to provide educational, fun entertainment through READING! Thankfully, it can often be acheived at minimal or even no cost thanks to her great program suggestions.

No man can be called friendless who has God and the companionship of good books.  ~Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Many schools have already completed the school year and the summer schedule is in progress.  At the start of summer it seems like there are many weeks to enjoy one another, however, my experience is that it seems like a blink and then my precious ones are back in school.

My children are still fairly young (6 and 8) and to instill in them the love of reading I provide every possible incentive available.  We had great fun last summer doing our Library Summer Reading Program and also participated in Barnes and Noble and Borders.  Click here for a list of programs available.  They are free to join and you can print the form at home.  What a sense of accomplishment to go to the store with a completed sheet of the books read and be able to select a FREE book to add to your own personal library.  Also, create awards for reading a set amount of minutes per week and permit your child to select from the award options.  Make it fun such as frozen yogurt date out, make your own sundae night at home or even staying up an extra 30 minutes.  The key is to make reading fun and provide incentives that will motivate the personality of your individual child.

Our school participates in AR Reading (Accelerated Reader).  If you are a homeschooling family or your school does not use AR the website can still be a great resource.  Click here to go the website and select parent.  You don't have to register or provide any personal information to research books at the desired reading level.  I then make a list of what appeals to my children and is in their reading range and via my online library account  request the books.  I put a post it in the inside cover of each book with the reading level and place in a book basket.  This secures my boys are reading books that keep them challenged, however, are also at their personal ability level.  I purchased the baskets on sale at my local Hobby Lobby and placed a tag with their name on each one, thus, giving them a sense of ownership.  The books stay in the basket when not being read which also aids in getting them returned to the library on time.

Happy reading sweet sisters!  Stay turned because this summer I will also be sharing my personal recommendations for great reading for the lady of the house.

TV.  If kids are entertained by two letters, imagine the fun they'll have with twenty-six.  Open your child's imagination.  Open a book.  ~Author Unknown

Free-for-all Friday: Consignment Store Props & Monthly Reading Program

Awhile ago, my friend, Katie, referred me to a new consignment store in our area. I've had some bad consignment store experiences--mostly due to lack of organization--so I ventured to this new store called Kid 2 Kid with somewhat low expectations. Much to my surprise, it exceeded my expectations and I instantly fell in love.

The store was clean, organized, not crowded, pleasing to the eye...It didn't leave me with the feeling that I needed to plow through dust and moth ball odor to find a glimmer of a treasure. In fact, at just a glance, I spotted many boutique and trunk show items in excellent condition at a fraction of the cost. Right up my alley! Not to mention, the toy, book, gift (many brand new Melissa and Doug items) and BOW selection (beautiful, brand new bows of all sizes at very reasonable prices. Oh, how I love those bows!).

Kid to Kid (K2K) is a nationwide chain and we are blessed to have TWO in our hometown. I highly recommend you check their website to find the closest one to you. They have some great programs from which you can benefit.

• Income- If you consign at K2K, you have the option to receive cash or an additional 20% if you choose to receive store credit.
• Frequent Shopper's Discount- Be sure to ask for a punch card and they will stamp your card for every $10 you spend. After you fill the card, you will receive 20% off your entire purchase on your next visit.
• Discount per transaction- If you sign up for their email list, K2K will email you any sales and specials plus a monthly password so that you can receive $5 off a $25 or more purchase. This usually ends up scoring me a free bow! :)
• Reading program-This last program has been a hidden gem and you don't want to miss it if you have a K2K in your area. Praise the Lord for my friend, Tara, that spilled the beans, or boy, would we have been missing out. Turns out, K2K will give you a Book Club card per child (they even gave me one for my one year old twins) and your child (or you) can pick one book-per card-per month- FREE up to $1.99. If you select a book over $1.99, you simply pay the difference. It makes for a great summer outing and we ended up getting three precious books today for a mere $3.00 out of pocket. How perfect is that to add to your fab new book organizational system from yesterday?!?! :)

Hope you have one of these great franchises near you so you can take advantage of it's opportunities. If not, perhaps you should open one in your area?!?! Just sayin...

Happy Friday ya'll!

-Hannah

Train Up Tuesday: "Large Family" Book Winner Announced!

Good morning, friends! As promised, we are announcing the "Large Family Logistics" book winner today!

Each person was given one entry (even if they posted more than once) ;-)

Our winner is:
Rain, who said:

Just found your blog! Can't wait to spend more time here. I just had my 6th and would love this book! My best piece of advice- take time to nurture your marriage.

Congratulations, Rain! We hope you do indeed spend more time on the Roof and I surely believe you will GREATLY benefit from this book, too! Looks like God knew you needed this (with having a 6th) ;-) Rain, please email me at ahugmiller@hotmail.com with your full name and mailing address and I'll get this out to you asap!

Have a blessed day and a WONDERFUL Mother's Day, everyone!
-Ashlie

We're Giving Away the House....

Okay, not really. BUT, we ARE giving away a great book to help you get your house in order! ;-) What book? Well, go back yesterday and check out the book review for "Large Family Logistics". I'm telling you, the book is LARGE! And I think it will make an even BIGGER impact on your family. It could make a great Mother's Day gift for yourself, a young mom, mom of young kids (whether they have just one or a dozen).



We'll do a "no-fuss-we-all-get-a-fair-chance" entry. (Which means everyone gets just ONE entry by leaving the appropriate comment below). To enter, in the comments:

1. Give your first name and the initial of your last name.
2. Answer this question: "What is the best piece of advice that has most impacted your home?"

Entries must be in by noon (EDT) on Monday, May 2nd. Winner announced on Tuesday!

*************************GIVEAWAY CLOSED************************

Good luck!
Ashlie

Train Up Tuesday: "Large Family Logistics" Book Review

Okay, I know what your thinking since you read the blog heading - "'Large Family'? That's not me! I'll pass!" But just wait a minute, please.

Technically, we are not a "large family" (though we've now passed the 2.5 child per household average). BUT, I have trouble keeping my house in order - clean, tidy, organized, on schedule with homeschooling, open for visitors and friends to drop by, etc. I had trouble with that with one kiddo, much less (uh, er, more) with 3!

Vision Forum has offered a new book recently: "Large Family Logistics: The Art and Science of Managing the Large Family," by Kim Brenneman. My thoughts were, "well, if it works for a 'large family', I'm sure I can learn SOMETHING!"; and learn, I have. :)

I've read other "organizational" type books before, and I have them either neatly on my shelf, or I've passed them along to someone else. Usually, these books are a little overwhelming for me because in the end, I don't know where to really start, I don't have time to figure out a good schedule/method, and most importantly, there is a HUGE lack of motivation for me.

However, in the last few years, God has been doing a work in my life and in my family. Through other books by godly women and studying His Word (especially Titus & 2 Timothy), there has been a bit of a change (well, I say that; hopefully I can get some backup from friends/family who have seen it, too). My outlook towards my role as a woman of God has fortunately changed for the better and more for His glory (though I certainly haven't reached it all yet!). "Large Family Logistics" has added to that, too. The "motivation" behind the "Logistics" is spiritual, and that benefits your family, certainly, but more importantly, your testimony to those who need Christ!

I really want to share a little from this book, in hopes that you will make it a resource for your home. Resource is a good word, because this book is LARGE, as in size! It's like a textbook! But it's well-worth your $20-$25.

Brenneman's motivation for writing this book is to help women who are like she once was - struggling to handle even the basics, longing to master even the "simple" things, and perhaps overwhelmed by it all, even with just 1 or 2 children.

In Part 1 of the book, she goes through the many challenges that are in front of us, from being overwhelmed by the Proverbs 31 woman, lack of goals and systems (the benefits of having them), having a self-check (your attitude and discipline), evaluating your time, life's interruptions, making it work when you have little ones or babies, and getting your family on board. She covers all that and so much more, while offering tips in each of these areas that are both practical and necessary to be successful.

In Part 2, Brenneman goes through what your week can look like in a very practical way. She gives great outline suggestions for your personal "Home Management Book" that include dedicating a day of the week to specific tasks (like "Town Day", "Laundry Day", "Kitchen Day"). Part 2 also shows how you can get beyond just "maintaining" and make your home a source for ministry.

I know some of you are probably rolling your eyes at the idea of "scheduling" your days at home, especially if you are a bit of a free spirit or "artsy" (yeah, I know those code words....I've had them applied to me here and there), but in having a workable system, it leads to so much more freedom and liberty to move through your days and weeks without having an extra load on your shoulders! It gives a great sense of security even if you do have an "interruption" to your day or week. You know that you'll get to whatever you missed later by keeping up with your system.

I feel like I've barely scratched the surface of what all is in this book, but it has been a game changer for me! My sister read it first, and I can see changes in her life, too! I recommended this book to another friend (Laura who is married and has 3 boys 4 y.o. and under). She bought it and had almost all of it read within 2 weeks! Here is what Laura had to say about it:

"The beginning is very eye opening on what we are supposed to be doing as mothers and wives. The second half is filled with so many good ideas. I can't believe that I haven't thought of some of this stuff. I complain every Sunday about how hard it is to get to church, but I have never once thought of packing the diaper bag ahead or laying out all of the church clothes. I have complained about my kids waking up sooo early and how I can't get a shower. Well thank you 'Large Family Logistics,' I have planned out how long it takes to shower, dress, Bible study, throw in load of laundry, and be ready to greet little children with a happy face. And I love love love the 15 minute clean sessions. I always think 'oh there isn't enough time to do these things' so nothing every gets done. It is amazing how setting a timer works and how much can really get done in a little amount of time when I work at it."

To be completely honest, I haven't accomplished everything this book sets out to help you do. The book is a resource and can be read in it's entirety all at once or in bits (for whatever area you want to work on). In about 1 1/2 months, though, I've been pleasantly surprised at the change in our home, both in cleanliness and in general attitudes towards "work". My little helpers (3 y.o. & 5 1/2 y.o.) seem more inclined to help, too. Yes, there have still been days (weeks) where I feel disappointed by what wasn't accomplished or feel momentarily "overwhelmed", but, again, at least I have a workable system that gives me hope! :)

So, if your looking for help in your role as homemaker, this is a FABULOUS tool!

Much love,
Ashlie

Train Up Tuesday: So You Think You Want to Homeschool (Series...Part 2)

Last week, I talked about the 2 basic things to "go to" when making a decision...especially one regarding homeschooling. Remember, I mentioned that we prayed, asking God to guide us to the resources we should review, considering that I didn't have a lot of time to research a million things and I had no idea where to begin.

God answered our prayer for this resource by way of a referral from a couple of friends. They both mentioned the book Cathy Duffy's "Top 100 Picks for Homeschool Curriculum". I seriously should own this book, as often as I've referred to it when talking to friends lately. However, I actually just borrowed it from the library. What a resource! It takes the "overwhelming" feeling out of you and replaces it with a better handle on what you need.

It's more than a rundown on some lady's favorite picks, although that may be enough for some people. No, it starts off by asking you as parents to come up with your education philosophy. What are your goals for educating your children. She has a chart of questions to get you thinking about these things and shows you how to see what is the most weighty in your decision making.

She also considers your child's learning style and offers recommended learning "approaches" for the learning style. After you put this together with your family's philosophy, you can then start browsing through her "Top Picks". She matches up your preferences, the child's learning style, the appropriate "approach" (Classical, Traditional, Charlotte Mason, etc.) while also considering other issues that may be important to you. (Like for me...how much prep time is involved?) From there, you can see a good match among a few choices, rather than a storehouse of thousands of suggestions! You can get her review of the curriculum and an idea of their suitability.

I STRONGLY recommend checking out her link and the book. You will be amazed at the burden it helps to lift from your shoulders :) Even if you don't go with her "Top Picks" (we actually went with one of her suggestions that didn't make the top 100), the book still equips you with knowledge and know-how in making an appropriate decision for your family.

Hope it helps you as much as it did my family!

Come back next week! We'll talk about the curriculum I've fallen in love with :)

Ashlie

More w/ Wednesday in the Word's Glenda!

On Friday, Glenda did amazing interview along w/ her husband, Preston, with host Jim Wood of the program "Abiding in Christ" aired on Sirius/XM radio. Jim read FINDING HOPE and did an excellent job conveying its message. This interview is especially wonderful because you hear them speak--in a raw way--from a mother's heart and a father's heart. You may also want to become involved in Jim's work of helping troubled young people at Wears Valley Ranch in TN. Here's an mp3 link to the interview: http://tinyurl.com/4qmu7lu

Enjoy and pass it on!

Safeguard your Spouse Sunday: Fillin' Up Those Loooooooove Tanks!

Yesterday, I listened to a Focus on the Family podcast that featured Dr. Gary Chapman, author of the book, The 5 Love Languages.  If you haven’t read this book, I think it’s a must-read for couples.  I’ve even found that it has helped me learn how to love other people in my life better (like a sibling, friend or parent) by tuning into to their specific love language.

On this particular broadcast, Dr. Chapman suggested an exercise for married couples to complete once a week.  He suggested asking your spouse how full their “Love Tank” is on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest rating.  If your spouse says anything less than 10 (which would mean they are soooo filled with love, they couldn’t possibly feel any more love in their life), then the next question he suggests asking is, “What can I do to help you feel more loved?” I love my husband with all my heart, but I know I can always do a better job at showing it.  So I decided to ask my husband these questions that same night!

After dinner, before I got up to start the dishes, I suddenly got very nervous.  Just as I was getting ready to ask the official “Love Tank” questions, I realized I haven’t been doing much to intentionally make him feel loved lately.  My husband is a very kind and gentle man, but he’s also honest, so I knew he wouldn’t sugar-coat his answer.  I also have been overwhelmed with life in general these days and to be honest, I thought to myself, “I don’t possibly think I could accomplish one more thing in my day or put one more item on my To-Do list”.  Ever felt like that?  (If you’re a mom, I’m sure you’ve felt that way too often- or is it just me?!?) . 

Well, imagine my surprise when his answers included mostly small things that I can easily fit into my day.  One example was that he loves it when the baby and I meet him at the door when he gets home from work.  Since I can hear his diesel truck coming a mile away, that’s more than easy! :)  He said he’d also like more dates nights with just the two of us.  What a great idea!  My apprehension was quickly laid to rest and now I have a tailored-made list directly from my husband of great ways to make him feel loved. 

So, ladies, what do you think?  Is tonight the night you’ll ask your “Love Tank” questions?  I definitely encourage you to do so!

Love,
Jaime

PS Oh! I forgot to mention my “score”.  It was a very generous 8- I am sure I would have scored myself much lower than that :).

Ready for Spring Giveaway!

The winner of the book and Starbucks Gift Card is LoisAnn.  Please email me your mailing address:thegrossmans@carolina.rr.com and it will be in the mail.  Happy Reading!


In celebration of Spring and all the wonders it entails  I am giving away a copy of a fabulous Christian fiction book that is based in the Outer Banks of North Carolina and I am also going to include a Starbucks Gift Card.

Alice J. Wisler's third novel Hatteras Girl is an incredible book to  enjoy this Spring/Summer and will have you dreaming of the summer sun and ocean air.
 
This book follows approximately a year in the life of Jackie Donovan who is a single lady close to the age of 30 working a reporter for a local publication.  Jackie's days are consumed with interviewing local businesses for her work, going on blind dates and caring for her best friends son who is Kindergarten age while her best friend juggles the responsibility of working two part-time jobs and being a widow.

Reading this book is like sitting down and learning about the details of the life of a close friend.  The main character, Jackie Donovan, is lovely and possesses incredible loyalty, love of family and dreams that she desires to fulfill.  Most women will find her easy to relate to as Jackie struggles with family commitments, desire for a life partner and the dream of owning her own Bed and Breakfast.  Jackie's friends and family are quirky, real and experience love and loss.

As you follow Jackie's decisions and revelations you can see how the hand of God protects and guides and gives her the desires of her heart.   I highly recommend this work of Christian Fiction by Bethany House.

If you would like to be entered in to the drawing for a copy of this book please leave a comment indicating your favorite vacation spot.  This can be a vacation destination you have enjoyed in person or one on your dream list!  I am also going to throw in a $10 Starbucks card to give the opportunity to take a friend  for a nice hot or iced drink.

The winner will be announced on Monday, March 21st and entries will be accepted until 10:00 a.m. on the 21st.

Happy Reading and blessings to you today, Caroline

Giveaway Winners!

Congratulations to our THREE winners of Finding Hope in Times of Grief! Each of these peeps will receive a copy (signed upon request) mailed to them.

1. Catherine
2. Cindy
3. Tracy Suzanne

If you would like your own copy or simply want to have some copies on hand as a gift when the need should arise, you may place an order here.

Happy reading and stay tuned for another exciting giveaway Caroline is hosting tomorrow!

Safeguard your Spouse Sunday: Enjoying Intimacy

This article was written by Natalie and posted here on Passionate Homemaking. It's a topic about which RWAV ladies have shown concern and been very responsive so we appreciate Natalie sharing via PH!


Imagine for a moment: one night, you sit down on the couch next to your husband, put your feet up to relax, and start talking. You’ve been waiting all day to tell him what’s on your mind.

He turns to you, rolls his eyes a little, and grumbles, “Well, honey, it’s my joooob to listen to you jabber about your day, the kids, and what you made for dinner, so (sigh…) go ahead. But keep it short.”

(Tension in the air.)

This imaginary story hardly begs an explanation! Let’s draw it out anyways.

Duty vs. Desire
We wives can never be satisfied with less than being enjoyed, loved, and adored. Especially when it involves romantic, mushy-gushy things like…talking. A dutifully-listening husband would just not cut it.

OK. Now, time to flip it around.

Don’t our husbands want the same kind of treatment from us? They want us to enjoy, love, cherish, desire, and delight in them! Especially when it involves romantic, mushy-gushy things like…well, you know what they love! I think we all know how important intimacy is to our husbands. The real question is, how can a wife rise above duty (merely being “available” for, or present during, intimate times), to really love and adore her husband? Let’s put ourselves in our husbands’ shoes, and think it through.

A husband wants his wife to honor him by being delightfully interested in spending intimate time together! What does that mean? A wife shows genuine interest when she pursues not only his, but also her own enjoyment.

(Crickets.)

Some wives might say that’s not selfless or truly loving. Let’s go a step further and work through it.

This is the part that really rocks my socks: that pursuing my enjoyment in intimacy with my husband is good, because my marriage should reflect the Christian’s pursuit of delight in God!

 Whoa. Unpacking time.

Delight in God
John Piper says the way we glorify God is by enjoying him. It’s not complicated. If I love God…think he’s wonderful, awesome, and amazing, doesn’t that say something about him? Doesn’t that show him honor?

Here are some of my fave scriptures that tell how we should be absolutely tickled at God…and that we get to be with him:

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. (Psalm 16:11)


My soul longs, yes, faints for the courts of the LORD; my heart and flesh sing for joy to the living God. (Psalm 84:2)

Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you. (Psalm 73:25)

Oh, to be enraptured with God, to derive our greatest pleasure and happiness from him!

Delight in Your Husband
Likewise, in marriage, if you were absolutely delighted by being with your husband, wouldn’t that honor him for all that he is?

Don’t you, deep down, want to be caught up in delight and pleasure with your husband?

Every woman dreams of that. But when your husband is less than loving …when he hardly inspires delight and adoration…when you have no extra love to overflow…

God answers our womanly dream. He is the perfect inspiration of delight to our feminine hearts.

You shall no more be termed Forsaken,
and your land shall no more be termed Desolate,
but you shall be called My Delight Is in Her,
and your land Married;
for the LORD delights in you,
and your land shall be married.
For as a young man marries a young woman,
so shall your sons marry you,
and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,
so shall your God rejoice over you.
Isaiah 62:4-5

Give of that overflow, to your husband…and love it!

Some Practical Tips
- Pray that you will love marital intimacy.

Do this first. You cannot have real love and delight for your husband unless God places it in you.

- Meditate on Bible passages that describe God’s love and delight in you. (See my favorites above)

Allow God to heal your soul from believing you’re not loved, pursued, or don’t deserve to enjoy your marriage. You don’t, but Christ bought it for you. Use scripture to tell your soul to receive it.

- Take responsibility for your role.

If you have a passive attitude about intimacy, and you think it’s your husband’s job to make it fun for you, sorry. You get out what you put in.

- If you’re not “there yet”, don’t give up.

Discouragement can be your worst enemy. Don’t create self-fulfilling prophecies in your head. “Well, it’s never been all that great up till now…” Hope. Learn. Keep trying. Relax. It’s not supposed to be that difficult!

- Talk honestly with a trusted older married lady friend.

- Know your body.

It’s not magic! Learn about your physical makeup and what “tends” to work.

- Read books. In this order, I like:

A Celebration of Sex: A Guide to Enjoying God’s Gift of Sexual Intimacy, Dr. Douglas Rosenau

Intended for Pleasure, Ed and Gaye Wheat

The Act of Marriage, Tim LaHaye

- Establish traditions and routines.

- Break traditions and routines! (Sometimes.)
Keep it varied and FUN.

- Pray again that you will love marital intimacy.

You might feel you’ve tried everything. Ask God to help you understand yourself. “He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry. As soon as he hears it, he answers you.” (Isaiah 30:19)

What will you do to improve on/continue to show your delight in your husband?

Book Review and Giveaway

The Life Ready Woman by Shaunti Feldhahn and Robert Lewis

Are you a ‘Doing it all’ or ‘Do what matters’ woman?

Whether a stay at home; or working mom, an airplane-hopping executive, an empty-nester caring for multiple generations or a single juggling high demands of career and personal life, today's fast-paced modern world leaves women gasping for balance. We as modern Christian women want to look to the Bible for guidance on how to manage our lives -- but because the world of women looks so different today than it did when the Bible was written, it is hard to find chapter and verse that seems to apply to our situation today.

Thankfully, God has given us exactly that timeless, unchanging guidance for how to find peace, clarity, and God's best for our lives once we know where to look! The Life Ready Woman: Thriving in a Do-It-All World, reveals a profound biblical roadmap for how each of us can find the abundant life we are longing for, rather than the stressful, torn, how-do-I-balance-it-all life we often feel like we are trying to keep up with today. Actually being a LifeReady Woman means that you are clear about your life, bold in your faith, and able to find God’s best for you, and the end result will be that you not only survive but thrive in our do-it-all world.

My Personal Review:

This book is a must read by all women no matter what stage of life. One of my favorite parts of the book is found on page 142 "A choice for one thing is a choice against another". Life is full of situations and opportunities. There is valuable insight and life guidance tips; no matter if you are spending your daylight hours with a newborn at home or as a top executive  This book provides thought provoking questions and things to consider no matter your season of life and how to live each day to the fullest as you carry out your calling. The subtitle of Thriving in a Do-It-All-World snagged me. It doesn't say; thriving and doing it all. The honesty this books conveys about how our choices impact not only the present, but future seasons of our life is insightful while also being sensitive to each of our individual situations and callings.

I believe you will find this book not only insightful, but impactful not only today, but as you continue on your journey as a woman.  I am thrilled that the publisher has provided a new copy of this book for me to giveaway on my blog. If you would like to be entered in a drawing for your own copy of the book please leave a comment with your name and email here. The winner will be drawn on Friday, February 26th and notified by email and also posted on my blog.

Love,
Caroline (aka Happy Four)

And the Winner is...

As promised, we are announcing the winner of the "One Wintry Night" book (mentioned last week).

This year's winner (because this is looking to be an annual thing!) ;-) is.....

The Barbee Family!!!

whose comment was:

"I have checked this book online, based upon a recommendation I got from a friend. I would love to win this."

Could you post your email for me so that I can email you for address information? I'll delete it from the comments as soon as I get it from you! :)

CONGRATULATIONS again! I know your family will love it as much as mine!

-Ashlie

Stay at Home Saturday: WHO feast!

Last night my family had THE best time as my parents hosted a Who feast incorporating all the fun from How the Grinch Stole Christmas. EVERYONE got into it and I'll admit the adults might have REALLY gotten into it. If only I could post the pictures of my mom and dad in full costume but that would be serious blackmail and I promised...Here are some pics I CAN post.

There were Who placecards for each of us.

Even the dishes had name cards!

Just one of the costumes...our resident Cindy Lou Who in full costume The set up
The Who Feast Menu

Roast Beast Sandwiches (Barbecue)

Who Hash (Scalloped Potatoes)

Who Pudding (Corn Casserole)

Dessert-Grinch Green Pudding (Vanilla pudding colored w/ green food coloring)

We concluded the festivities with our All Star Who (my dad) reading How the Grinch Stole Christmas and then drove to see Christmas lights b/c a local home happens to have their yard lit w/ Whoville. It was all so fun. I would recommend your family, young and old, giving it a whirl. I guarantee a great time.

Now, here is your Savory Smackerel for this Saturday. Who Pudding (aka Paula Deen's Corn Casserole). This is a paaaarrrrrrtttttaaaaaayyyyyy in your mouth. I promise you will love it and it's a perfect Christmas side dish.

Ingredients

1 (15 1/4-ounce) can whole kernel corn, drained
1 (14 3/4-ounce) can cream-style corn
1 (8-ounce) package corn muffin mix (recommended: Jiffy)
1 cup sour cream
1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, melted
1 to 1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar

Directions
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
In a large bowl, stir together the 2 cans of corn, corn muffin mix, sour cream, and melted butter. Pour into a greased 9 by 13-inch casserole dish. Bake for 45 minutes, or until golden brown. Remove from oven and top with Cheddar. Return to oven for 5 to 10 minutes, or until cheese is melted. Let stand for at least 5 minutes and then serve warm.

Happy Saturday!

Love,

Hannah Lou Who :)

Train Up Tuesday: The Best Way to Find What You've Lost

So, today, my husband and I found out THE best way to find something you've lost...

Nope, it's not retracing your steps, or looking in the "last place" (you know, because you usually "in the last place you look"....um, who continues to look after the looking in the "last place" if they've found it by that point?).

The BEST way to find something you've lost, is to buy another one to replace it! It's almost a sure thing that you WILL find the "original" about 5 minutes after you bring the new one home. Case in point, I could NOT find my "One Wintry Night" by Ruth Bell Graham this year when going through my Christmas and Advent things. I was so agitated! I had all the ornaments for our Jesse Tree that we decorate based on this book, so I had to postpone starting that....until last night, after asking my sweetheart to buy another copy. He gave it to me first thing upon arriving home and said, "Ya know, we'll probably find the original in about five minutes."

Before bed last night, we read it, and then opened our special ornament box to place a snowflake (for Chapter 1) on the Jesse Tree. Low and behold, in the bottom of the box (that I DID open about a week ago and kinda glance through, I promise!) was our original copy of our beloved book. Sigh. We were all very happy about it.

And YOU should be happy about it, because.....

I'm giving the new copy away to one of YOU lucky readers :)

AND....

EVERYONE has equal, fair opportunity to win it because everyone only gets one entry. No extra entries for FB liking, tweeting, blogging, etc. Just a fair chance for all you ladies ;-) Sound good?

You can still share the excitement with your pals and family so they can try to win, too (hey, maybe they'll give it to you if they win and you don't) ;-)

So, just leave a comment on today's blog post. That's it. You have until 12 midnight (EST) on Monday, December 13th to enter. We'll draw a lucky winner then and announce next week.

Be sure to check out last year's mention of this book for a peek at some BEAUTIFUL illustrations: "One Wintry Night".

Missing Wednesdays in the Word?

Hey ya'll!

Hope this post finds you enjoying fall and steering clear of these twisters that are picking on the Midwest and us down in the Southeast.

Did any of you wonder what happened to Wednesdays in the Word? Well, Glenda's been a little on the busy side~she had twin grandchildren, her son's wedding in Alaska and a reception for family on her side of the motherland, a traveling husband in ministry and keeping up with the schedule of a teenager at home. Two words...FULL PLATE. Her heart is still very much bent towards young moms b/c that is when scripture became alive to her.

BUT in the midst of all of the above, she was asked to do a book along with her husband about grief and how they found hope in the midst of losing their youngest son. This book will be out in March. In the meantime...

It's clear that there are many, many people that have suffered loss and and are learning to wear the grief that has become their new reality. Because of the need in this realm and the multitudes on facebook, they did not want to delay providing a unique place for grieving people to get together and share, ask questions, but most importantly find HOPE.

If you or someone you know has experienced loss, please visit Finding Hope in Times of Grief on Facebook and share in whatever way you feel led (see the discussion tab). Your experience and thoughts could be the voice of thousands of others that can't muster up the strength to speak and maybe even the catalyst for them to begin healing in some of the most painful parts of their journey. In the meantime, the Lord may even use it to provide unexpected healing for you or a loved one. Regardless, I pray that you and those close to you will gain an even greater sense of hope through having Jesus Christ as your anchor!

Train Up Tuesday: Your Reading is Good for the Kids

Hey sisters! Nothing "deep" today ;-) Too hot these days to be thinking of anything profound, I suppose.

Weeks ago, I had asked your suggestions on reading material for women during the summer. Though I did receive quite a few responses, I have hesitated on posting them. Not because the books aren't worthy of mention, but mainly because of my concern of recommending things I haven't actually read myself.

That being said, please feel free to leave a comment to this post (wake up "lurkers"!) ;-D What are you reading this summer. Has it met your expectations or left you disappointed? Would you truly recommend it to a friend...or stranger if it meant that they may assume things about you or your convictions upon reading it? What books have entertained you?

I am currently reading "For the Children's Sake: Foundations of Education for Home and School", by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay, a book explaining Charlotte Mason methods and discussing what it means to have a Christian world view and the impact it has on life and education. So far, I'm loving it....especially since we are using the Charlotte Mason approach for my almost kindergarten boy.

I'm also reading "Little House on the Freeway: Help for the Hurried Home", by Tim Kimmel. This book speaks of the balance needed in our daily lives and the importance of real rest in our homes and families. Again, thus far, it seems to be a great, helpful read.



I've also read or am reading a couple of books that remind me of my childhood - "Anne of Green Gables" by L.M. Montgomery (I LOVED the miniseries from the 80's!) and "Pollyanna" by Eleanor H. Porter (again, love that classic Disney movie). I never actually read either of those growing up, though I adored the lead characters. "Anne of Green Gables" was even more delightful than the miniseries! I am just beginning "Pollyanna" with my kids. They actually ask me to read it to them every night, which surprises me, because the Disney movie version is quite different (at least in the early chapters) from the book. But we are enjoying it together.

I'm learning (thanks to exposure to Charlotte Mason) that it is important to let children see adults reading...and enjoying what they are reading. It has that trickle down effect. And in sharing my reading experience with my children, they learn to think about what they are hearing (no pictures!) and appreciate someone else's work, all the while allowing their little minds to imagine things for themselves.

So, that's what we're up to these days.

Again, please share what you are reading (appropriate content only, please) ;-)

Hope you are staying cool,
Ashlie