Train Up Tuesday: THE Greatest Love of All

There has been so much to say about Ms. Whitney Houston's death. Much of it reflects sadness not only on how many of us presume she passed, but also over how she chose to live much of her life. She provided so many "anthems" that are considered the "gold standard" in music now. Unfortunately, between the lines of her songs and her life is clearly marked sadness and loneliness unsuccessfully veiled with false self-confidence. And even more unfortunately, these songs really are anthems for this generation.

Consider today "The Greatest Love of All", it speaks of how children today need to be taught well and led, how in her own search for a "hero", she found no one to meet her needs and found loneliness as a result. In attempt to take care of herself, she looked to herself to find that the "greatest love" is "learning to love yourself". Sadly, in the end, she learned that this was not enough after all.

Is this enough for our children? Looking to themselves for their safety, love, acceptance? There HAS to be more that we can teach them! Well, I have GREAT news, WE CAN teach them and show them a better way!

Do you know THE Greatest Love of all? Of course, I'm talking about Christ, primarily. But there is something more I want to share. If you are married, it is your marriage relationship. Read Ephesians 5:22-29 for full context, but read this quote by John Piper:

The main meaning of marriage is to display the covenant-keeping love between Christ and his church. In other words, marriage was designed by God most deeply, most importantly, to be a parable or a drama of the way Christ loves his church and the way the church loves and follows Christ. This is the most important thing for all husbands and wives to know about the meaning of their marriage.

"Marriage Is Meant for Making Children...Disciples of Jesus, Part 1." (Sermon delivered on June 10, 2007).

I came across this during our youth group's Sunday night gatherings. We are using a resource from "Children Desiring God."

Teaching our children to love, value, and respect the marriage covenant IS the way we can teach them and lead them in the greatest love of all and in leading others towards that. Are you valuing that relationship? Are you doing everything to protect it and honor it, to make it of primary importance to your family? Are you preserving it for your children's sake and the sake of the unchurched? I've mentioned it here before, that Titus 2 isn't there just so we can have happy homes for our own sakes, but so that God's Word isn't dishonored. Do we really believe that?

One of my awesome girls in my 10th-12th grade small group that I am humbled to lead brought up something quite profound. We were discussing Satan's lies and how he makes the "traditional" family look unnecessary or lacking. I asked them why they thought Satan fights so hard to tear down the traditional family and makes divorce look acceptable and desirable. One dear girl said (and I paraphrase poorly), that Satan hates the picture of Christ loving the Church for eternity despite their shortcomings. He seeks to destroy that testimony to the world so that the world won't believe that Christ could really love them that much.

Wow! This is one girl who IS being led properly in her home and is learning to have that Christian worldview. And she is right. Satan does want to fight tooth and nail to blind us and the world to God's love and perfect plan.

Let me leave you with a slightly more inspirational song that you may hear today, in light of the greatest love of all. The message isn't perfect, but if you can "redeem" the lyrics in light of Christ's love for the Church and our love for Him, maybe you'll think a little differently next time you hear "I Was Made to Love Her". Take it, Stevie:

Train Up Tuesday: I HEART Resourcefulness!

Okay, this really isn't a deep subject, but I love resourcefulness. Sometimes I get mistaken for someone who is creative, when in reality, I think it's just that I'm cheap....er, thrifty...and don't like throw too many things away that I think I could use for another purpose (don't worry, I'm not THAT bad!...you'll never see me on one of those hoarders shows). I prefer the word "resourceful" over cheap and thrifty, though.

Things that get me excited? Well, Pinterest (naturally). But also, I recently found myfridgefood.com. You can check off what you already have on hand in your pantry and fridge and voila! SEVERAL recipes for you to make based on your list! (Okay, so, if you don't have very much on hand, I suppose your list would be pretty short.) I made fried cheese...yeah, just shredded cheese fried in a pan. My kids loved it...why couldn't I think of THAT on my own?!

I also recently read an email sent to me on the hundreds of uses for coffee filters. And guess what? When I was making said fried cheese, I was out of paper towels....so....coffee filters fit the bill that day :)

So what's the point of this and how does it relate to kiddos? Train them to be resourceful! Yeah, I know that's simple and seems like common sense, but I think that today's kids have missed out on learning "street smarts" and resourcefulness. We have gadgets and gizmos for everything these days. Many kids are super busy with so many "things" and activities, and when they do have the rare moments of being bored, they aren't encouraged to be left to their imaginations.

We all know the best 5 toys of all time include a box, a stick, and a string. If you have to "give" something to your child to encourage imagination and resourcefulness, start with those basics. When your child asks for something she doesn't have, suggest an alternative in using something she already owns. Make a game of coming up with as many different ideas or uses for one toy, tool, or gadget. Pretend you are an alien from another planet and trying to figure out what the gadget is. Look for open-ended toys to encourage play.


It's in boredom and in times of "want" that creativity and resourcefulness really blossom! Think of the great inventions and stories that come from these times! Don't sell your child short by not allowing him to use the gift of time and the things around him and in his head to do or make something spectacular (in his or her own world).

Train Up Tuesday: My 3 Sons

Chris Kale Photography

I love being a mom, for so many reasons (although from recent posts you've learned what an exhausting job it can be!). One of the things I love about relationships that God allows us to experience (friendships, marriage, parenthood) is how it can cause us to wonder about God's relationship with us.

Recently, now that I have 3 boys with 3 personalities and various needs, I've been praying (quite earnestly) about making sure that God makes up the difference in the attention and time that I give to each child. I love them all so much, but sometimes I fear that one may lack in the attention he needs from momma.

My oldest child is in his second year of homeschool. That means he gets lots of attention from me (thought not always my completely undivided attention). He thrives on learning and doing new things.

My youngest child is a newly walking toddler, into everything, exploring everything, and still needing mommy for lots of things (especially attention). I love the "newness" of this relationship and discovering his personality.

Then, there is my precious middle son, and if you have a "middle" you know what I mean. He sometimes will observe classtime lessons and do the activities to the best of his ability, but usually he wants to get into something other than what is on task. :) He often gets "into trouble", "on my nerves" (asking for things that I can't do at that moment), or like at this VERY moment he is under my arm shaking my hand as I type making an otherwise easy task quite difficult. But....I love him for it. And I know he probably lacks in getting the most attention. So, I have to be purposeful in taking him with me on errands (alone), letting him help me in the kitchen (though it takes at least twice as long), and just holding his hand while walking through the house to let him know I know he is there, and I am there for him.

I wonder if God lets us see this as parents to maybe let us catch a glimpse of Him. We all are in different parts of our walk with Him. Are we deep in His Word, learning about Him, walking with Him and thriving in that each day? Are we new in Christ and relishing in all that the newness brings? Or maybe we feel like we are missing out on something (whether or not it is of our on doing). Yes, sometimes the nearness we feel to Christ is a result of correction, but sometimes it can be His presence as we seemingly struggle in finding where we "fit" with Him and His family.

Regardless of where we are "in THE family", it is so reassuring to know that God wants to draw near to us and will use any means necessary to bring us to that point. Yes, He indeed draws near to those who draw near to Him.

My sweet middle son is indeed striving to draw near to mom, and though I may not be able to give him the same attention as his brothers, I desire to be near him, too. And, though through different methods, I do just that.

If you feel yourself as a mom, struggling to keep balance with your babies and their needs for your attention, pray to the Father to help you make up the difference and that HE would make up the difference in their lives as well.

And take time to thank Christ for wherever you are in your relationship with Him. Seek to draw near to Him and thank Him for how He expresses His love towards you, even though it may not look just like the way He is expressing it to someone else. "Oh, how He loves us!"

Blessings,

Ashlie

Train Up Tuesday: Lest I Forget That I Only Have Them a Short Time

Ever have one of those weeks, days, or months where parenting is just plain tough?! That's been me the last few weeks. Yeah, I read the Good Book and other good books, and implement what I know to be true and timeless standards, but sometimes, it's just tough. Lately, it's been one of those "I-love-you-but-I-don't-really-like-you-at-this-moment" kind of seasons.

In times like these (come on, even those of us who see this as "no greater joy" still have times like this, right?...or is it just me?...are those crickets I hear chirping?), I've found great encouragement in a few things:

1. Admit it - to your spouse, to friends, hey, even on (dare I say?) Facebook. I did all of those things recently. My husband is amazing and knows how to refresh my spirit. And all it took on FB was a status update: "I could use prayers today. Having a tough day as a mom/disciplinarian." That alone lit up my wall with encouraging comments and prayers of friends that I know are lifted me in prayer. It also welcomed inbox messages from people who otherwise wouldn't have ministered to me (thinking I otherwise have it "together" all the time).

2. Pray - which is "admitting it" to God, but it is also a way to soften your heart towards your children, because you do want to mold them into God's image and into turning their hearts towards him.

3. Read your Bible. The ultimate in true godly counsel!

4. Good music. My 15 m.o. son figured out how to find music on my iPhone long before I did! The other night, he pulled up one of my favorites (okay, he's not really a genius, he didn't know it was a favorite, but I do think God was working through my baby's fat little fingers at that moment). Jars of Clay "Boys (Lesson One)" - it speaks of a parent handing down lessons of great worth...and the reminder that all this (growing up, parenting) goes by all too quickly...

Sara Groves also has a couple of songs that I'm trying to keep in my heart and mind: "Prayers for This Child" and "Song for My Sons" (the first being a "prayer" and the second being similar to the Jars' song for its "advice").

Hope that brings you some encouragement to keep pressing on!

Ashlie

Stay at Home Saturday: Praying more in 2012

Some of you may still be cleaning up from Christmas and wondering what on earth to do with all of those Christmas Cards. I first shared this idea last January, but wanted to repost for those of you that may have missed it.

In years past; I made a Christmas scrapbook where I placed all the photo greeting cards received, however, in all honesty, that scrapbook is on a shelf and the photographs have not received the attention they deserve for the thought that went in to the family photographed, printing and mailing of each. It is no small time commitment or cost to send them out and we so appreciate each one we are honored to receive. As I have two young boys I know it is no easy feat to get a family ready for a portrait.

Here are a few ways to pray for those friends and family that sent you a card:

1. Place all the photograph/cards in a basket and each night at dinner have someone in the home select a card. This is a wonderful way to share with your children or spouse the history of the relationship, trials the family may be facing currently or in the past prior to uplifting them in prayer. Then place that specific card in another basket as a symbol that you have prayed for that family/individual. When the basket is empty you can place them all in again and start over if you wish.

2. Number each photograph/card on the back with a number. This would work well with small children that are learning their numbers and dates. For the day of the month you pray for that special family/individual with the number that correlates with the calendar month (months of the year that don't have 31 days families with those numbers will be prayed for the last day of the month). When you have numbered your cards through 31 just start numbering over again (you will have several families to pray for each night depending on the volume of cards received).

3. This same idea can be used by last name. Place all last name A's together etc. through Z and place them in order and pray for those last names one initial per evening.

4. Lastly, if the above ideas are too overwhelming for you I would encourage you to place the cards in a large manila envelope and put aside. When you have a few minutes of prayer time pull out one of the cards and lift that individual/family up in prayer.


Let's pray for each other in 2012.

I John 5:14-15
"This is the confidence that we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of him".

Luke 1:37
"For nothing is impossible with God".

Free-for-all Friday: What does God have to do with Polar Express?

I know Christmas is over but with all of this cold weather, you may still be watching this movie...

I'll never forget the first time I saw The Polar Express. I was about five months pregnant with my first child and I went to the theater with my sister and a friend. I remember crying during the movie because it was just so good and sweet and, since it was Thanksgiving, I left truly in the Christmas spirit. Ever since that November day in 2004, we have made watching this movie a family tradition. We break it out early each season and it is watched over and over again until January. Both of my older children were obsessed with it when they were young toddlers, and they still will sit on the couch mesmerized by it. Even though it's watched an extreme amount of times each Christmas, it seems to never get old. So, the other week we were watching it for probably the 200th time and all of a sudden it dawned on me that this movie has a major spiritual tone. I always knew it did with the "believing" concept, but it was like a huge light bulb went off in my head--the characters of the hobo, the conductor and Santa represent the trinity! Stay with me now...

First, let's start with this guy:

I have always wondered what or who he was. Why was he in the story? And why does he look like the conductor and Santa...it's like they're all the same person, even though they aren't. If you notice, he's always asking the little boy (who isn't sure if he believes in Santa) what he thinks of Santa Claus....does he believe in him. He's always popping up in the story when things get tense and he either helps or questions the little boy's thinking. I think this character represents The Holy Spirit. I figured this out when the little boy picks up the bell at the North Pole and looks at it. If you'll notice in the movie, you'll hear the hobo's voice say "NOW!" really quietly (I had never noticed it before) and THEN the little boy says, "okay, I believe....I believe!". It's like the hobo (HS) was convicting him and making him realize that he does believe.



I think this guy represents Jesus:




He is the one who brings the train full of people to Santa (God). You can't get to the North Pole without him. When Billy is hesitant to get off of the train once it reaches the North Pole, the conductor tells the little girl and little boy that you can't make someone come...they have to be willing. Hmmmmm. AND on the Polar Express song that the conductor sings, he says "you can ride for free, if you just say yes!". We all know that salvation is free for anyone who is willing to accept. He's also aware of the Hobo and refers to him while looking at the little boy with a knowing look in his eye.





So, obviously this guy represents God:



In the movie, Santa is revered by all. He knows the very instant when the little boy says "I believe" and he approaches him by saying, "What is that you said?"

Has anyone else thought of these metaphors before? Am I crazy that I never have? There are so many others....Billy is a poor little boy and some of the others on the train are privileged (salvation is for all people), the elves could represent angels, the North Pole represents Heaven. Your mind could go crazy thinking of all the metaphors. Anyway, I knew I always liked the movie and now I really do. My sister said that she read somewhere once that Tom Hanks (the man behind the movie) is a Christian. I'm not sure if that's true or not, but I hope that he is and that he put these metaphors into the movie purposely. Anyway, just some thoughts by me. Can anyone else think of any other metaphors?

Train Up Tuesday: The Conspiracy

If you are an ardent Advent lover, you've probably already heard of the Advent Conspiracy. It's for those of you who want more from Christmas...and by "more" I DON'T mean more gifts :) Check out this video for a brief overview:

When I was first introduced to AC a couple of years ago, it was instrumental in impacting my family's traditions. It has lead us to spend less on each other, make more gifts, get creative, and give more towards missions (local and internationally) and towards those around us in need of help or encouragement. The last few years have been exceptionally wonderful for us. I can't remember much that I've received in way of packaged gifts, but what we've received as a family in contentment, joy, quality and quantity time cannot be matched.

I hope that the recent weeks' posts have encouraged your gift making and giving, but more than that, I hope this week's post drives you to do more by doing less in some areas.

Merry Christmas & join the Conspiracy!

Ashlie