Love is not envious (1 Corinthians 13:4). Wikipedia defines envy as an emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another's(perceived) superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it." Envy is the opposite of generous. It is a feeling of ill will to those who are equal to us. Envy leads to hate or a covetous desire for something.
If we place envy in the context of marriage it looks very ugly, childish and selfish. The loveless marriage is often because we chose to be at war with our spouse and at war with anything good in his life. It can be as simple as being envious that my husband "gets" to ride to and from work in his truck everyday with no kids and no distractions. On the other hand the envy can root deeply and stem from the feeling of inadequecy a stay at home mom feels as she gives up career and paycheck to "stay" home and take care of the children and the domestic duties. Envy can lead to bitterness and contempt towards our husbands. There is no good fruit that comes from a bitter woman who focuses in on what she doesn't have.
Love is not envious. Love IS generous. Love looks the good things in our husbands lives and motivates us to celebrate those things! Here are some applications for today:
1) Pray and ask God to reveal areas you may be envious of your husband.
2) Admit to yourself, confess to God and to your husband where you have resented something good in his life.
3) Celebrate your husband and his good fortune today! Do something to show your appreciation for him and remind him (and yourself) of the character traits you were drawn to him in the beginning days of your relationship.
Remember, we are all in the process of change and growth. Truth sets us free as does honesty with ourselves and vulnerability in our marriages!
With grace and love,