Monday, August 24, 2009

Letting go of our babies...

Today was the first day of kindergarten for our oldest son, Michael. I didn't have many expectations for the day other than one less boy around my house making noise! To my surprise after dropping him off at school, coming home and sitting down the flood gates opened and my heart was broken. Five and half years flashed before my eyes and then I realized my little boy is on his way to becoming a man and fulfilling God's plan for his life. Whether his days are short or long, our time at home is over. Enjoy the moments with those little ones at home. I now understand in my heart all I was told by older women who advised me to enjoy this time.

The greatest comfort I have found in this day is knowing, trusting and leaning upon the truth that our God is ever present and all knowing. The Lord spoke to me and gave me Psalm 139 today. I sat down and substituted Michael and him in all the places it says I and me. I encourage you all to do the same for each of your children as you commit them to the Lord each day.

Changing seasons and eyes full of tears,

Psalm 139
O LORD, you examine Michael and know him.
You know when he sits down and when he gets up;
even from far away you understand his motives.
You carefully observe him when he travels or when he lies down to rest;
you are aware of everything he is doing.
Certainly his tongue does not frame a word
without you, O LORD, being thoroughly aware of it.
You squeeze him in from behind and in front;
you place your hand on him.
Your knowledge is beyond our comprehension;
it is so far beyond us, we are unable to fathom it.
Where can he go to escape your spirit?
Where can he flee to escape your presence?
If he were to ascend to heaven, you would be there.
If he were to sprawl out in Sheol, there you would be.
If he were to fly away on the wings of the dawn,
and settle down on the other side of the sea,
even there your hand would guide him,
your right hand would grab hold of him.
look up the rest and write it out for your children


Aundrea-aka Zerbert Baby said...

Thanks Annie! We started 1st grade last week and I found myself nervous on the way to school that morning. I find myself thinking about what he is doing and how he feels at school. I love Psalm 139 and read it just this morning. It is so comforting to know that God knows 'when Peter sits and when Peter rises' and that He is 'familiar with all his ways'. For five years I was the one who knew when Peter sat and when Peter rose and was oh so familiar with his ways. Letting go is not easy, but giving my children to the Lord each day will make it just a little bit easier.

Jesikarena said...

I can understand your heartache! I have an 19 month old little boy and I get choked up just thinking about him going to school. Turning our loved ones over to God and knowing that he loves them more that we do is a hard thing. But its better he knows so much more that we do. (now if I can only convince myself of that) : )